Trying to work

Why has it gotten so hard? I don't know if it's coz of the new boss, the increasing workload, a new structure or just the fact that I had way too much fun last week to snap back into workmode.

I can't even bear to unpack my clothes. Some of my laundry were done at G's place so it smelt like his clothes. As I picked out my outfit from there (they were the freshest plus 'skimpiest' coz HK is freakin hot right now), the smell made me wanna cry.

I slept badly again. I don't know if it's coz the humidity/heat/dust makes it hard or it's just purely psychological. I went to bed at 12.30, woke up at 1am. Fell asleep later, woke up in the middle of the night and was coughing/sniffling badly. I was frustrated. I burst into tears and pounded my bed in frustration. I wanted to throw myself out of the window! I felt so alone and apart from frustration, I don't know how else to describe how I felt.

My cleaning lady came in this morning at 8.30am. She's cleaning up the house right now. Hopefully everything will be neat & tidy and most importantly NON-DUSTY. I'm going to go back at 12 noon to pay her for her services and 'inspect' my place.

HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS! I cannot go on like this. I sit here at my desk looking blotchy, blaming my illness when asked, when the truth is I just feel like crying for all the damn time. I hate being weak but I also can't help it.

Well Shirley (my older sister) and her friend will be coming to HK on the 29 July - 1 August and Kai is coming on 4 August. I hope their company can help allievate my boredom and snap me out of this 'depression'.